Top Twenty-One Reasons To Watch The X-Files

by Persephone (whoever that is)

1. There are no reasons for madness.

2. Where else are you going to learn how to perform autopsies, for free?

3. Because sex with squirrels is just plain wrong.

4. Because it's all completely true. Seriously.

5. As a child, your mother would never let you have a pet flukeworm.

6. The possibility of seeing William B. Davis in a Speedo.

7. Because Jesus will always love you, no matter what.

8. Admit it, humanoids with exceptionally large ocular cavities really turn you on.

9. Gillian Anderson's rather appealing mosquito bites.

10. David Duchovny with neat Native American painting on his face.

11. The little kids & teenagers are usually possessed by demons. (See, I *told* you the show was true.)

12. Where else on network television do chain smokers have names like "Cancer Man"?

13. It's always good for a laugh to see someone try to run in heels. (Poor David -- that must really hurt his feet. No wonder he cries so much.)

14.You get the drama of "Party of Five", the nifty vocabulary and the blood of "ER", the gunshots of "NYPD Blue", the murder mysteries from "Murder, She Wrote", the paranormal phenomena from "Sightings", and the cool conspiracy theories from the anti-government right-wing militia separatists, all in one show.

15. It's fun to go on the Internet and piss off Chris Carter by talking about how much you would love to see a Mulder/Scully romance.

16. Mitch Pileggi's sweat.

17. All that unresolved sexual tension between Mulder and Skinner.

18. Everybody else is doing it.

19. It fills that dark empty void in your soul.

20. Social lives are for dumb people with nothing else to do.

21. Because sex with squirrels is simply NOT RIGHT.

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